Empty Days

I am lonely, and my heart hurts. The entire day stretches out in front of me, empty and sad. And in such stark contrast to how I used to spend my time. Us, together. Just talking. Joking. Being silly. Sometimes talking seriously about our feelings and where our relationship was going, sometimes not. It never mattered. I’d talk to this man about anything. He was just genuinely fun to spend time with. I miss that, so much.

I’m going to drive and visit a cousin I haven’t seen in a while, which will be nice. It won’t take my mind off of him, though. So far, I haven’t found anything that does. Seriously, I am open for suggestions. I am useless as a human being right now.

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4 thoughts on “Empty Days

  1. i don’t think you’re useless, you just need to occupy your time with other things so that you wont think about him so much

    • I know I do. I just don’t even know where to start. I concentrate on thinking of other things, and I think I’m getting somwhere but then the pain comes out of the blue and snatches my breath away. Thank you for your kind words.

  2. Try volunteering in your community, either with kids or animals. That might help. You’ll be able to form relationships with other people and hopefully, they can give you a new support system, which no offense, but you seem to not be relying on one.

    A support system of people who you interact face-to-face will more than likely help. So, get out there and help someone and then that person’s smile just might help you.

  3. I am trying to utilize my friends and family for support. I just tend to be a person who doesn’t like to bother other people with her own issues. I like to pretend that everything is fine. So, I’m trying to step outside of that normal response a bit. It did help to talk to my cousin today, and I still of course have my son to take care of. Which is one very important reason that I am working to get past this pain and why I am fighting to not slip into a a depression again.

    Thanks very much for your words.

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