It really is. I got an email from his wife yesterday. She read the post where I talked about what he wrote to me. Well, she read everything I’ve written, but she wrote to me based on that post, and how depressed I obviously was about it. She said that “he sent it after I confronted him about his feelings for you after we talked the last time”, and that “he did it for me, so I could be completely sure that he was in love with me and was indeed trying with all he has to make me happy.” She wanted me to know it wasn’t done to hurt me.
I appreciate that she was concerned enough about my emotional state to write and offer an alternate motivation for his action. I do feel that there are many other ways he could have demonstrated his commitment to her other than by seeking me out and kicking me while I am down. Regardless of his reasons, it really wasn’t a nice thing to do. It was at best inconsiderate of me as someone he caused harm to, and certainly unnecessary. So even if it wasn’t a deliberate attempt to hurt me, and I’m willing to believe her that it wasn’t, that was still the end result.
She thinks I should move on, and that this blog is a good way to help me do so. She was concerned that I might do something stupid because of the severity of my depression. A legitimate concern, and again, I do appreciate it. As I’ve said before, she is a good person caught in an unfortunate situation.
I’m doing better, I think. Ups and downs, always. I guess that is the nature of the beast. I have some thoughts that still need exploring, things I was already working on and others that were stirred up by hearing from her. But I am actually tired for once, so I think I should take advantage of an opportunity to get some sleep. More later.