It is a daily battle, hell, a minute by minute battle at times, to regain my positive outlook. I’ve had a general overlying feeling of anxiety today, but while it wasn’t the best day I’ve had since this happened, it also wasn’t the worst. And I guess that is worth something.
So, in a spirit of forward thinking, I’d like to say that I love love. The idea of it, the thrill of it, the possibilities of it. I like being a fool in love, I just do. As hard and painful as this has been, as it still is, for me, I do believe in love and I really do think it is worth taking a chance on. Next time I’ll try to temper it with a little bit of knowledge and, not caution exactly, but maybe some awareness. But I guess I still want there to be a next time, after my wounded heart heals some more, and I am relieved to realize that.
I’m not looking forward to the whole starting over part of things, but hey, baby steps, right?