The Now

My original purpose in starting this blog was to try and deal with the pain and betrayal I felt after learning that the man I loved was married. I’m still dealing with that, but it is not the only thing in my life. I don’t want to let what he did to me define who I am. So, with that in mind, here are a few other things about me . . .

I have dealt with depression my entire life, and I’ve only recently discovered that writing actually helps. So I’ll be dealing with that some here, as well as my ongoing attempts to figure out what exactly it is that I want out of life, over and above a true and meaningful love, of course.

I am an artist. In the past, that has been the means I’ve used to deal with my depressive episodes. Recently, I’ve had a major artistic block, and I haven’t created much of anything new this year. One or two paintings, that is all. I’d really like to get through this block, as I miss the outlet.

I’m a mama, a friend, a voracious reader and basically a geek. I’m loyal, intense and I can be overly emotional.

I have a sneaking suspicion that I am having some sort of a life crisis. I’m definitely questioning things, from my past as well as my future.

I’m much more complex than anything I’ve written here.

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2 thoughts on “The Now

  1. I think that it is ok for this to be just one outlet….that we only see one part of you. Of course you are more complex. But you do need a forum where you can voice things. Your blog is a great spot for that. As for your artistic block….well they happen. Last year after a big project I didn’t paint for 6 months. It was awful. Some of the things that helped to break it were….do something in another medium. I play ukulele! I have made a few terrible sculptures. I tried watercolors. I tried keeping a sketchbook although I never can finish one. oh and I tried painting with my left hand a few times…..fun but terrible. Good luck with it. And keep those posts coming….for any reason at all. -Josh

    • Hi Josh. Thanks for commenting! I read your blog every day, and I love what you are doing. I’ve been trying to do my own little “think a happy thought, do a nice thing” sort of version, off and on at least.

      I do hope my artistic block will pass soon. It’s not helping that my studio area has slowly been taken over by other stuff. I need to get in there and clean and organize, that is bound to help. Maybe that will be semi-next on my list of things to do. My never-ending list of things to do!

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